I should have known something was up when SHE put the giant bowl of Iams AND the giant bowl of water on the floor. Boo had disappeared earlier that morning, but I thought that was just a present--NOW I know SHE had taken him to the vet for boarding. Then the next thing I knew, the dogs were jumping all over the place, SHE shooed them out the door, and that was it. Silence. Continuous silence for three and a half days.
I wandered around the house, crying piteously, but no one answered. I even tried to jump on the counters but my old legs just don't give me enough OOMPH (although I did manage to bring down a small bowl as I fell). I missed my nightly bowl of yummy chicken Fancy Feast. So, after the first day of no one here, I decided to get pissed (or, for me, MORE pissed than usual).
Yes, it's true and I'm not ashamed. I pooped on the rug at the back door. Where SHE'd walk.
It was all for naught, unfortunately. Apparently SHE was expecting me to throw up while SHE was gone and while that didn't happen, SHE was still on the lookout and saw the poop before SHE stepped in it. Damn.
The dogs ran in with HER and while SHE was out getting the luggage, Boogie managed to eat a mouthful of the Iams. Then like an idiot, when SHE came in, Boogie started groveling and pretty much let HER know she'd done something wrong. Like if she were able to speak, she would have been screaming "YES, I DID IT! I ATE THE CAT FOOD! WHIP ME!!!!!"
I have no idea why my readers have ANY sympathy for this nut job of a dog.
Tried to let HER know how displeased I was with the abandonment by hissing at HER whenever she petted me, but she just laughed and said, "Oh Poonie, I know you missed me. Stop that hissing you silly cat!"
So I stopped hissing. Because you know, like, I really DID miss HER. Sort of.
The Week in Junk: Fruity Finds
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