Pet Wars, Part I

Holly: "Hey, who just pushed my bed off the bed?"

Boo: "Heh, heh, The Stealthy Squashy Face approaches, undetected!"

Holly: "Oh, for gosh sakes, it's that darn cat thinking he's invisible again."

Boo: "Ever more stealthily, the graceful feline commando circles the unsuspecting dee oh gee."

Holly: OK, now I'm getting mad. Stop it!
Boo: "Like a snake, he slithers over the Wall of Protection and into Operations Central."

Holly: "Now that's going too far, you creep. Ouch!"
Boo: "ATTACK ATTACK ATTACK!!!!"

Holly: "Oh, good grief, I give up. Sigh."
Boo: "Mission accomplished. Naptime!"

Mellow Fellow

Human: "Ohhhh--isn't he just adorable?!!" Me: "That's IT. I've had it with all this cutesy stuff. The truth of the matter is, the little pig was belching and I demanded that he cover his mouth. If you knew the truth, Miss Fancy Pantsy Human, you wouldn't think he was so adorable." Kids these days have NO manners.

The Not So Subtle Mr. Squashy Face

Boo wanted everyone to know that he was sleepy and was going to take a nap in the dee oh gee bed.

And just in case anyone hadn't gotten the message:

Now, here I am, looking utterly distinguished and smart. Boogie, being Boogie, asked me if I am a Rag Doll cat since my legs are so short. After I'd thumped her smartly on the nose, I said, "No, you idiot--I'm old and my formerly rotund tummy has turned to flaps of hanging skin. Humans get to have cosmetic surgery for this. Cats do not." So goes another day. Ho hum.